Cassie Kellner [00:00:01]:
Welcome to The Bloom Effect. I'm your host, Cassie Kellner, former chairside assistant turned team coach and founder of Everbloom. This podcast is all about the real stuff, honest convos, leadership lessons, and the heart behind thriving orthodontic teams. If you're ready to grow, lead, and bloom, let's dive in.
Cassie Kellner [00:00:22]:
Welcome to The Bloom Effect. I'm your host, Cassie Kellner, and today I have the most incredible guest, and I don't typically do this. Dr. Emily Watson. Welcome, welcome, welcome, Emily. I don't typically do this, but I wrote an intro for you because I am so. Emily, I am so inspired by you. I. I feel all the feels right now. I. I can't even. I. I'm so excited for this podcast. Thank you so much for joining me.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:01:01]:
Oh, Cassie, thank you so much for having me. And honestly, I feel the same way about you and the work that you do, the help that you've given us. It's so, so amazing. And so I'm so thankful to be on here with you today.
Cassie Kellner [00:01:16]:
Oh, my gosh. Okay, so here we go. Are you ready?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:01:19]:
I'm ready.
Cassie Kellner [00:01:19]:
This is what I wrote. You haven't heard this. I'm really excited for this. Okay, here we go. Emily is an orthodontist in Indiana with a booming practice and a powerful message to share with the world. We first met and worked together last year, and I was instantly. I have tears in my eyes. I was instantly inspired by her leadership, her vision, and her heart she pours into her work. Dr. Emily Watson is the daughter of T and Key, Cambodian refugees, the the mother of two, and the author of an incredible story that weaves together her parents journey and her own. Emily's story is a perfect example of why I started this podcast to highlight resilience, gratitude, and the courage it takes to show up every day in life and in leadership. I wrote this from the bottom of my heart. Dr. Emily Taing Watson, welcome to the Bloom Effect.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:02:19]:
Thanks, Cassie. I hope I don't cry during this whole episode.
Cassie Kellner [00:02:26]:
I just. I'm so excited to share your message and your story with the world. And, Emily, you write this in the book. Actually in the very. At the very end, you write. I hope that this book resonates with others and it can make you, you know, really think about your journey. And I did. I thought about my journey the entire time, and my journey is nothing like your journey. But I. I just, you know. Okay, so let's. Let's start from the very beginning, because people are like, what are you talking about? Cassie. Emily, you wrote a book called Roots of Resilience. Lessons in Courage, Family, and the Power of Showing up and Every Day. And we were working together. I'm going to tell our backstory. We were working together. And you said we were talking about marketing or canva. I'm like a nerd when it comes to that stuff, but I'm not a marketing guru. I'll throw it out there right now, but I love design and creativity. And we were just chatting about it, and you said, so I wrote a book. And I was like, what? And I was like, what do you mean you wrote a book? And then you told me what this book is about. And your book is about family and leadership and your parents stories of being Cambodian refugees and growing up as kind of first generation and your life and your childhood and your journey in orthodontics and all the things. And you sent it over to me, by the way, just so everyone knows. And we're going to get to this later. The book comes out today officially, so congratulations. I cannot. Oh, and you wrote this book. You sent it over, and I begged you to be on my podcast, like, please do this with me. Everyone needs to hear this story. And so I'd love for you to explain why, like, why did you decide to put it all on paper and why now? You know, I love it so much. Why, Emily? Why did you decide to do it?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:04:50]:
Yeah. So as you know, and I'm sure we'll get into it, but my parents story is so unique. And I think growing up, I didn't realize the impact that their story could have on helping other people. And it's always been everyone that I've met that has talked to my parents has always said, you should write a story about their story because it's so amazing. And it's always been in the back of my head that it's been a dream of mine to put this down on paper. And as I started to do that, it turned into, you know, I share all the time these little lessons that my. That I remember from my childhood. And they all trace back to my parents and what I saw when I was young, things that they told me. And it's just shaped every part of my life today that it became a story of their lessons that they taught me and lessons that are great for everyone and how that weaves into every single part of my life today.
Cassie Kellner [00:06:16]:
Emily, it's such a powerful story. It's such a powerful story. I'm so glad. I mean, so many of us have stories, you know, and and for you to be able to write this, share this story with your children and your husband and your family and your parents and. And, oh, gosh, so many chapters I want to touch on. I can't. I don't even. This is going to be the longest podcast and it's gonna be. I truly. Okay, so your father. Do you want to give people a snippet of your parents journey?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:06:49]:
Sure, yeah.
Cassie Kellner [00:06:50]:
Okay, go for it.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:06:51]:
So my parents again are. They're Chinese and Cambodian. And in the 70s there, there was always kind of civil unrest in Cambodia. So my mother remembers, you know, she had to stop going to school, school when she was in second grade because there were, you know, people fighting and bombs and shooting and things like that. And so starting then, there was a civil war back in Cambodia. And in 1975, there was a dictator, his name was Pol Pot, and he was in charge of this terrible regime called the Khmer Rouge, who. Who essentially took the entire country over and, you know, killed millions of Cambodias. Anyone that had an education, doctors, lawyers, you know, religious. Anyone who is religious. And they wanted to just sort of force everyone to work kind of, you know, in a. I don't know how to say this, but basically everyone was working, they said, for their own good, like as one community. But really that was splitting families apart and, you know, forced labor with not enough food to eat. And my parents ended up surviving that when Vietnam invaded Cambodia in 1979. And they went to a refugee camp and they ended up there for a while and they ended up being able to come to the United States in 1979 sponsored by a church in Berne, Indiana. And my mom was only 20 at the time and left her mom and all of her family. And my dad was 25, so. So they had had an arranged marriage. They were not married for very long, and then they were able to escape through a minefield with a guide and. Yeah, make it to the refugee camp and then eventually got sponsored, which is just another incredible story as well, Emily.
Cassie Kellner [00:09:21]:
When I. I cannot even tell you the feelings I had while I read this book and how you beautifully weave in your story as well and your journey. So your father had really powerful words in this book and he said something that really, really stuck with me. He would keep telling you, you know, over. And I don't know if he still says this as. As an adult, but he would say, it's a miracle we're here. Mm. And I. It was like I highlighted it. You know, he says it many times to you probably throughout your entire life. I can imagine. How did that shape your mindset? And I. You talk about in the book where you didn't fully understand everything. Right. And maybe the reality is those of us, you know, my grandparents are immigrants, not my parents. So, you know, I'm a bit removed from that. But most will we really, truly understand at our core, you know, but you've done such incredible research. How did your upbringing and your family, how did that all shape your current mindset and how you lead today?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:10:48]:
Yeah. So my dad, you know, the. It's a miracle that we're here, Emily. My dad said that to me when I was asking specifically how he felt when they had no idea where my grandma, my mom's mom was, and they. They thought they found her. And my dad traveled back to Cambodia to verify that it was my grand grandma and aunt and uncle. And I asked him, you know, how did you feel when you saw her? Because it had been. They left in 79, and my mom didn't see her mom until 1990 or 91. And that's when my dad said, you know, it's a miracle that we're here. And he would also. When I was in the donut shop growing up, someone would come in and they would ask him, you know, how are you doing today, T? And my dad would always say, lucky to be alive, sir. Lucky to be alive. And I never, you know, they just always told me, you should be so grateful to live here in the United States. The freedoms that we have, the education that you have for free, which is not the norm in the rest of the world. And he would just say, you know, don't take that for granted. And I think at growing up, I heard the same things. Right. So it didn't resonate with me at the time because I grew up in the States and as I got older, you know, and have a family of my own and a practice, you know, just reflecting on that statement, it. It's like everything, anything that could happen in a day, or any hardships, if you want to call them hardships, compared to my parents that I've ever had. You know, they've just always told me that someone else would love to have your life. You know, you just have to be grateful. So I feel like when you wake up, you know, my dad saying, I'm lucky to be alive, he really meant that because there were times when they literally thought they were going to die multiple times. And so to take that type of mindset, and when you wake up every day and you're just like, I'm so lucky I'm here. It makes your whole day shift because while you may face hardships, you know, I always just look back and go, well, what did my parents go through? Like, this is nothing compared to that. So I think it just makes you more resilient.
Cassie Kellner [00:13:37]:
Yeah. And perspective. Right? I mean, are you kidding? Truly, you know, I just, I want to go back to the donut shop. You talk about this throughout the entire book. It's a massive piece and I learned a lot, you know, about, you know, it's very typical for Cambodians to own donut shops. I had an aha moment of my childhood and a. I don't know if they were Cambodian, but a family who owned a donut shop in my hometown. And it made so much sense to me, the fact that your parents could come here, flee be sponsored, rely heavily on their faith and these individuals in Indiana and then own. Work at the donut shop. Own the donut shop, own the building. Like Truly. Like the, the layers. Right. Of this story and how powerful it is. And you talk a lot about your childhood, Emily, which I think is really, really important here. Of. I remember a sentence that you said and I'm not, this is not exactly what you said. I'm paraphrasing here. But you said like you would sleep on the flour bags in the back of the donut shop. Right. You say many times Your parents worked 365 days a year and, and growing up, there was some resentment there that you had because you didn't fully understand. You know, can you speak to that? And now as an adult and a mother and you know, but, but looking back at, at that childhood in that donut shop.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:15:32]:
Yeah. So I mean, first of all, let me say that I love that my parents owned a donut shop because I love donuts. And a fun little story. My dad, when I was in second grade, he would pack a bag full of donut holes for me and in class I would go into the closet to get something and I just like stuff my face full of these donut holes and then go back to class. But so I do love the donuts. That was certainly a perk. But yeah, growing up every day my dad had the same routine. So he would wake up at 3:00 or 3:30 in the morning, he would go to the donut shop, which is only about five minutes from our house. He would work until 11 or 12, come home, eat lunch, take a nap. And then at about 3:30 he would wake up again and go back to the donut shop until about 7 or so. And then he would come home and we would eat dinner, and, you know, he would do that all over again. And so my mom was busy, you know, taking care of us and, you know, making sure we were fed all day. And she was helping him at the donut shop and, you know, buying supplies that they needed. And also they were taking care of their parents at the time. And so there would be times where, yeah, we would be sleepy, and my dad would lay an apron on a flower sack, and we'd just lay there in the back waiting for them to get done. And I. Growing up, you know, I first realized that I was different than my friends when I went to school. School, and one of my friends had asked me. They came over to our house, and one of my friends had asked me, what. What is this spoon like that looks so weird? It was. It was like a soup spoon that you, you know, if you go eat noodles or something. And that was one of the first moments that I realized, like, I'm different than everyone else. And my parents were traditional and so very, you know, typical, strict Asian parents. And so things that I was allowed to do and things that my friends were allowed to do were very different. And growing up, obviously, you do want to just fit in, you know, and. And it was. It was hard. Um, and I did wish, you know, I remember a time when I asked my dad, you know, when can we go on vacation? All of my friends are going on vacation. When can we go? And my dad said, do you want food to eat and a home to live in and clothes to wear, or do you want to go somewhere for a week? And I'm like, well, I'd really just like to go somewhere. But that was, you know, he always said, we have to work so that we can send you to school and, you know, provide for you, and we're not going to go into debt and take out a loan so that we can go somewhere for a week. And I think now my dad also told me growing up, you know, we do not want you to do this. You need to go to school, go until you can't go anymore, get an education, and then you don't have to work seven days a week in a donut shop. This is not the life that we want for you. And so, you know, that I always kind of had that in the back of my mind that my dad said, you know, do something that can help people. My mom said that she always wanted to be a doctor growing up, and if she could have, she would have gone to school for as long as she could, could. So I was so lucky that I had that support. And even though, you know, I was in school for so many years after high school, for them to have them believe in me and tell me, you know, no, you can do this, keep going, you know, don't worry about the debt that you're accruing. It's going to be okay. I mean that was huge. And it just makes me now when I'm able to. My husband just said to me yesterday, he said, you're living out all of the things that you wanted and wished that you could do when you were younger. And yeah, that's so true. Like I, I make it a point to when my kids are home for break. You know, my office is, it's open, but not open. Like I'm not here. And so just trying to really enjoy the times that we have and places that I get to take them to that, yeah, I do wish we could have done and enjoyed when I was younger.
Cassie Kellner [00:21:03]:
Yeah. Yeah. You know, as, as mothers and parents, I have a very, very different story than you, Emily. But I grew up with a single mother who worked two jobs and worked very, very hard. She was first generation here. My grandparents are from France. And you know, it's really interesting as, as a mother now, I wanted all the things that we just genuinely couldn't afford because she was just trying to make ends meet without us really even knowing. Like, it's not like the, the, the. Those were big conversations in our home. I just knew like you, that I was different than my friends. I couldn't go to sleep away camp because we, I just, we couldn't afford it. I, There was a huge, in eighth grade, I remember I grew up in Northern California, but there was a Washington D.C. trip that everybody got to go to and I did not because again, you know, we couldn't afford it. It was just you. Our stories are different in different ways. But I remember being like this feeling I feel now as a 13 year old girl not being able to join and go on this trip that everyone talked about when they got home won't be the case for my children because of financial, you know, things that, that, that will occur in adulthood. And so I had these dreams of doing something more, being more. And so did my mother for me, you know. You know, and so I again, you know, I learned resilience in a very different way than. But it's really interesting that it shows up in adulthood and in motherhood.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:23:04]:
Yes.
Cassie Kellner [00:23:05]:
You know, I look at My children. And I don't know if you can relate to this. I am sure you can at certain ages. And I go, wow, I didn't experience what you're experiencing right now. And I almost get to relive it through. Just. And you talk about this a lot through gratitude of like, I'm so grateful you get to experience this.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:23:31]:
Yes, yes.
Cassie Kellner [00:23:34]:
It's, it's. Again, I, this book was so emotional to me and I said this to you. You know, it showed up in so many different ways. Again, my story's very, very different than yours, but the reflection that you do, the, the, the hardships our parents go through, the, the goals that we set for ourselves. And also watching, just simply watching our parents, watching your parents go through all of this in this resilience and courage that they have that, that really innately sets into us without them even teaching us things sometimes. Because you're just simply watching how hard they work.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:24:22]:
Yeah, yeah. You know, yeah. Something that I, you know, there's so many. My parents own their own business. They encouraged me to own my own business. And the things that they have to deal with. Owning a donut shop compared to me owning an orthodontic practice, it's again, the, the trials and the hardships of owning an orthodontic practice are nothing compared to owning a donut shop. And something that I've reflected on in our huddle is, I don't know, I need to ask my dad this, but I don't know. Actually, I did ask him, you know, how can one person work every single day? We, you know, we're so lucky. In the dental field, most offices only see patients three or four days a week. And the weeks that I have, I mean, there's a lot of paperwork and there's a lot of cases and things, but the days that I have a full week, which is a four day week, it's a lot for me.
Cassie Kellner [00:25:35]:
Yeah.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:25:36]:
And I kind of joke about it with my parents because my dad worked seven days a week and I say, you know, I don't know how, even when he was sick, how do you stay motivated to. There's no end in sight. It's not like, oh, you know, fall breaks coming up, Christmas breaks coming up, and I'll get a little break. There was no break. Like, my dad was in the donut shop on Christmas, working in the morning on Christmas and any holiday. And he just said to me, you know, he was grateful that he got the opportunity to work because in Cambodia, when you have someone telling you what to do, and you're starving and you can't make money. You know, he was just so grateful for that opportunity to be able to provide for his family that he's like, it's just what we did, you know, it's how. How we survived. And I just think that's so amazing because I look at that on the days when I want to complain about my, you know, fourth day in the office, and I'm like, I just say to myself, I can't complain. There's nothing I can complain about. My dad would have worked. He worked seven days a week, much longer hours than I did. So I think, again, it just. It just shifts your whole mindset and how you take on the day.
Cassie Kellner [00:27:04]:
Yeah, absolutely. So gratitude was a really big theme in. In this book, throughout the entire book. And you talk a lot about how you lead and because of your upbringing, your parents story. And so I want to know, how did you bring that, your story, the gratitude, into your leadership style, right into your practice culture every day? Like, how did this trickle into the rest of your life? And being an orthodontist, a leader, a practice owner? How. How is gratitude there for you?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:27:56]:
Yeah, it's such. It's so huge. It is. You know, I feel like gratitude and service are kind of tied together. And I saw firsthand growing up, my dad, you know, he served his employees and the customers at the donut shop so well. You know, I remember I would be there in the morning, and as someone was, you know, closing the door to their car and walking up to the donut shop, my dad would say, you know, he'll take a large coffee with, you know, cream and three sugars. And when that person came up to the counter, their coffee would be there. You know, he'd have their donut order memorized. I mean, it was just really incredible. And I think service and gratitude, again, I talk a lot to my. To our group about, you know, we're here to serve the patients and families that trust us with their care, and that's a big responsibility. And, you know, they are. They're providing essentially for each of my staff members and our families, and it's so important that we deliver. You know, we always say, we talk about, there's this Disney book we read as a group, but on stage and backstage, and, you know, we have to be on stage because this kind of sounds harsh, but at the end of the day, our patients and families are paying us for a service, and they, quite frankly, don't care. You know, what you may or may not have going on in your life because they're paying you. And I think that, you know, again, the perspective of gratitude and I always, my consultant, Vicki actually shared this a while ago and it was a good one. And it was that your problems are still going to be your problems, you know, at the beginning of the day and at the end of the day. So leave your problems at the door when you come to work and they'll still be there waiting for you. And honestly, there have been times recently where, you know, life is not perfect. And I have had things too, and I told my staff, I think about that and I actually enjoy the fact that I get to come to work and do something that I love and take my mind off of the problems I'm having. I mean, that's a wonderful thing. You get to laugh and enjoy your, you know, colleagues and it takes your mind off of it. So I think, you know, service, keeping that in mind, that we're serving our patients and families and one another and then being grateful that we get that opportunity to do it. That is so huge.
Cassie Kellner [00:31:28]:
Yeah. You know, it's interesting. I think in ortho practices, we're running a mile a minute. Like it's, we know this, right. The minute that first patient walks in, you know, depending on how many chairs you have, like you're, you're, you're going like you're firing at all cylinders. Like it's real. And I think sometimes in ortho, in the ortho world, we forget that there's a 10, 11, 12 year old behind this. We're just like focused on archwire sequence and debonds and bondings and all. And sometimes we're moving so quickly we forget that there are these little humans.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:32:09]:
Yes.
Cassie Kellner [00:32:10]:
Behind what we're doing. And we are a huge part of their day. And sometimes those humans are going through middle school things that can feel so monumental to them.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:32:22]:
Yes.
Cassie Kellner [00:32:22]:
That then we become their safe space.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:32:25]:
Right.
Cassie Kellner [00:32:25]:
During, you know, this time of the day that they get to spend with us.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:32:29]:
Yes.
Cassie Kellner [00:32:30]:
And so I think, you know, it's all kind of like this full circle moment of what you're saying is you. Everyone is going to have problems and issues and, and all of the things. And also people are allowed to have bad days. Like you're allowed to have a day where you come in and you're like, listen, I'm really struggling, or, you know, my family member is sick or, you know, and, and I think that's the beauty in my opinion of small teams like this where you can go Listen, we have your back, you know, but to your point, you also get to come in and have lunch together and laugh and talk about really ridiculous things and you know, things that people did on the weekend and you know, and have this like true connection with your team. Yeah, I think is also incredibly important. And you know, you talk about gratitude so much. I'm going to pivot here. And we didn't even talk about this, but I have to share it. There's something that we're going to do at the end which is like fun little rapid fire stuff. But you know, I asked you initially in our pre podcast conversation and then emails, you know, what is one word that would describe your leadership style and the response. Okay, so you decided, I'm gonna actually send this out to my team.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:34:06]:
I never thought of that before ever. Right. And I have no idea. I don't know.
Cassie Kellner [00:34:15]:
So you sent that out to your team. You were like, I don't even really even know how to answer this. You sent it out to your team and you said, how would you describe my leadership style? Which I loved. Okay, this is what your, some of your team members said in. And they just sent one words with one word. Some of them sent really powerful messages to you, but they're like inspirational, Empowering strengths, empathy, coaching, knowing our strengths, the mindset of chasing progress over perfection. Visionary, grateful. They just kept going. How did you feel when you got that back?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:35:03]:
Oh my gosh, I was teary eyed because I to backtrack one second about our team. You know, my team is close enough now that we, like you had said, we are allowed bad days. I don't expect everyone to come in and you know, every single day, maybe 99% of the time, yes, not 100%.
Cassie Kellner [00:35:32]:
You still have a business to run here.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:35:34]:
But we do have those conversations, you know, about, you know, I've shared with myself like, this is a rough time right now. This is what I'm going through at Huddle. So you know, say a prayer for me. You know, thank you guys in advance for helping me. And they've had things go on in their life and it's like this is what's going on at huddle. But at 8:30 when we start seeing patients, you know, we're back on stage. So I think it's important to also allow the space and recognize that yeah, we are human and we are going to have problems. But I think the difference is, is that with our group, you know, we're so supportive of each other and have built that type of culture. Um, so that's my backtrack. But yeah, but yes, I was teary eyed when they said those things because I had never thought of it. And I honestly, looking back, you know, I'm just so grateful for the team that I have now. And I tell them this. And as a business owner, as a leader, you know, 11 years in now, and there were times where I didn't know that I would get to this point. And it makes, I always say, like, all of the hard things that you go through. It makes you so much more grateful when you end. You're like, I had to go through that. Otherwise I would have taken the team that I have now for granted.
Cassie Kellner [00:37:21]:
Yeah.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:37:22]:
So I think, yeah, I mean, I was just so blown away and just grateful for all of them.
Cassie Kellner [00:37:32]:
Okay, I'm going to read one. Are you ready?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:37:34]:
Okay.
Cassie Kellner [00:37:35]:
Okay. You sent this to me and I. Okay. So this person wrote, encouraging. You make an effort to get to know each of our strengths and encourage us to draw on them to grow professionally. You also encourage each of us, through example, our core values, dedication, professionalism, mindset, extending grace, striving for excellence, sharing knowledge, patience in parentheses with ourselves and others, respect and faith. It's very rare. We are blessed. Maybe it would be better to describe your leading style as rare, Emily.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:38:17]:
I know that was.
Cassie Kellner [00:38:20]:
I'm teary. It's so powerful. And because you're sending me these and I had read the book, it was just like, you know, I have these moments of. I'm so grateful that you. We have crossed paths and I know this story and I know your team and I get to spend one on ones with your team sometimes. And, you know, it's so absolutely incredible what you have done. I want to talk to the book a little bit more. I want to read something from the book that was really, really powerful to me. Hold on, let me go find it. I have it here. There's three different highlights. The whole thing's pretty much highlighted. Okay, hold on. Let's see. This is in chapter two. Okay. You say, anytime little or big difficulties happen in my life, whenever I'm facing something tough, I lean into my faith and gratitude. And the lessons I learned from my parents. My mom instilled in us the idea that God saved my parents from the war for a reason. I have strong faith that whatever happens happens for a reason. Therefore, I try to maintain my sense of gratitude. I also, in a practical sense, ask myself if any negative situation, in any negative situation, is there something that I can change? If I can, then I do so. And if I can't, I let it go. This helps me shed any unnecessary stresses. There is enough to worry about in the things we can control. So I leave the things I can't control up to God. It's so powerful, because a lot of times as a business owner, you can focus so much on the negative.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:40:26]:
Yes.
Cassie Kellner [00:40:27]:
And there is so much that you can't control. And as an orthodontist and a mindset that literally works in millimeters.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:40:37]:
Yes.
Cassie Kellner [00:40:38]:
And the things that you can control and the things that you can shift in the mouth, you have full control over that. If something turns left in. In the matter of six to eight weeks, when they come back, you can control it, and you can move it back. You know, this was super powerful to. To read and to. I hope that people, when they read this, that they read this, is there something that I can change?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:41:09]:
Right. Yes. And that. That came out of years and years and years of focusing. You know, when we talk about the early days and all of the turnover in the staff and. Oh, just so many things that were out of my control, and I would literally let a decision or a situation that I didn't have any part of ruin my entire weekend because I was just focused on whatever that problem was. And again, back to my consultant and coach, Vicki.
Cassie Kellner [00:42:00]:
Yes.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:42:00]:
She would say, you know, I always kind of. She'd always say things like, there's nothing you can do about this. Go enjoy your weekend with your family. And I'm like, how can I enjoy my weekend with my family? You know, this person just quit. What are we gonna do? You know? And just down this rabbit hole of. I could literally spend my whole Friday, Saturday, Sunday, just ruminating on this one thing, and I couldn't do anything about it.
Cassie Kellner [00:42:34]:
Right.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:42:35]:
And I think. I don't know exactly when that changed, but it was like, well, the. The times when I felt the best was when I could do something. So it's like, okay, if I can't do anything, I just ask myself that, you know, someone makes a decision, can I do anything to change their mind? No. Okay. Onto the next thing. You know, what. What's something that I can get done? So I think that's so huge because it lets you shed unwanted stress and these big feelings that are not good for you and just, again, do something that you want to do. Be able to enjoy your family. I know that's hard to do, and things are. When things are tough, but I think that question helps so much. Can I change anything? Yes or no? And then go from There.
Cassie Kellner [00:43:35]:
Yeah, absolutely. It's, it's so interesting how it just is humans, right, we, we tend to harp and, and, and, and we take it all in and we're like, and then you look back years from now and you're like, why did I focus so much on this one tiny thing or this big thing, right? And instead of like, putting my boots on and, and go and getting in there and, and, and, and saying, okay, these are the things that I have control of. These are the things that I can actually fix. Yeah, we focus so much on the, the actual thing that happened to us. Yeah, I, I, it's really powerful. That sentence was, is just so powerful in the book.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:44:19]:
And Cassidy, the thing is, is that the thing that you have most control over is yourself. And when my team says, you know, their quotes on what my leadership style was, that was a huge point for me, was when I realized that I can only control myself and how I show up every day and control the way my morning goes when I wake up. That has allowed me to show up for my team consistently. You know, I just said to my, I mean, there was kind of this whole thing in 2018 with a remodel and a lawsuit, and everything was like, out of my control. And I said to my husband, like, I have to do something about this. And that's when I started my, you know, 4:30am waking up routine. Because I needed to start my day off knowing that something went right that day.
Cassie Kellner [00:45:26]:
Yes, right.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:45:30]:
I needed that win. And then I needed to, I just told myself, like, I know this is going on in my life, but my team doesn't need me to come in grumpy and complaining. You know, they need me to show up and be an example. Otherwise I can't ask them to do the same thing.
Cassie Kellner [00:45:48]:
Exactly, exactly, exactly. Emily. It's, I see it often where they're like, you can tell somebody is miserable in their position if they're the owner and the rest of the team is miserable. And I'm like, okay, let's start with some self reflection. You know, there is no magic wand. You actually really do have to do the work. You have to make the changes. And you did at that 4:30 moment, right where you went, okay, here's the shift. Here's something I have control over.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:46:21]:
Right?
Cassie Kellner [00:46:22]:
I'm gonna make the shift now. You know, I think one of the things we spoke about this even before I read the book is there's so many lessons in here for everyone and something that I found to be a lesson and, and especially for this industry is. And all industries, honestly, is that first generational generation professional that comes out of families of, of. Of parents who are immigrants and in the orthodontic industry. There's so many that resonate with you, Emily, that were the first to go to school, were the first to go graduate from college, that, you know, have, have these degrees, that run these businesses because their parents who were immigrants came here to give these children a better life. I guess it's just, it was so powerful for me to know our industry, to know you, to know your story, and that you are sharing this with so many other first generation professionals who can resonate with that. Yeah, truly. I mean, I can think of so many orthodontists that I know that probably have such similar stories to you but that haven't done what you've done and put it in on paper and written this beautifully written book.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:48:07]:
Yeah, I love hearing, I love hearing other people's stories and me too. I love the idea of when I was younger feeling like the things that made me different or bad or like I wasn't enough because I was different. And as an adult going, no, it's those exact things that make you exactly who you are today. And it's those, like I tell my team, and the strengths work. It's all of our. I don't want everybody to be the same because we wouldn't be able to accomplish what we do if everyone was exactly the same. I need everyone to be a little bit different and understand what those differences are and then use those strengths productively to serve our patients and families and each other. And I just love that every, you know, everyone has a unique story, everyone has unique strengths. And I love how it makes sense when you look at someone's strengths, you know, oh, that's why that person is this way. I just. It's great. I love it. Yes.
Cassie Kellner [00:49:27]:
Yes. So do you have a story or a lesson that you hope listeners remember most? Even for first generation professionals or women who are balancing all of the things. Right. Because we are a totally different animal. We're balancing motherhood and, and business ownership and, and being a wife and being present for our teams and our family. Do you have a story or a lesson that you hope listeners take in the most?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:50:12]:
I think maybe just like little one liners.
Cassie Kellner [00:50:16]:
Yes.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:50:17]:
So I think that as a wife, as a mom, business owner, there's so many things that you have to juggle. And I think that one thing I will say is, you know, have a coach. You have to, you have to show up for your team. But you need to have someone like my coach and consultant, Vicki, who's helped me so much through the years.
Cassie Kellner [00:50:54]:
Vicki Newell. Shout out, shout out.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:50:58]:
You know, she helped me realize that my strengths, which I thought were, you know, softer or, like, weaker strengths, you know, how to use those to be an effective leader. That was so huge for me. So have a coach.
Cassie Kellner [00:51:15]:
2.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:51:16]:
I would say Vicki's group also helps me handle the HR part of my practice. You can't do everything, and you have to have the right people on your team and trust that they can do. You know, hr, I always say, is not my. It's not my strength. And I even tell my team, I told them the other day, my consistency strength makes me wild. I mean, it just makes me crazy. And I tell them, I'm like, look, I have consistency. There is no room for any. There's no room for any. There's no wiggle room. You know, I. I don't know how many I can count on my hand the number of days that I've missed in the 11 years that I've been practicing. And I. And I told my team, I'm like, look, if you want something, don't ask me, because my consistency is going to say no. You have. You have a better chance of asking my office manager, Manon, than you do me. And it's not. It has. And honestly, it's not my strength. Right. So. And it takes away from my energy because my energy is best spent figuring out, you know, how I can best lead you and setting the tone in the office. It's not figuring out what to do if someone can't make it into work or, you know, that sort of thing. So, yes, have a coach, have someone handle your hr, ask yourself what things you can change or not change, and then have faith that it'll work out. Because I think there's so much time and energy spent in trying to, like in the past, hold on to people just because you were scared of losing them or holding on. You know, the fear of having to retrain someone. And now I say all of the people, and I can't even tell you how many. All of the people that had to leave, you know, it happened so that I could have the group that I have now.
Cassie Kellner [00:53:40]:
Yes.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:53:41]:
And so just have. Even in the trenches, you know, just have faith that whatever. You know, I would always say, Doris, my treatment coordinator, who went. We go to the same church. And she. There would be times where I would be, you know, crying just like, no control, and just saying like, you know, help me make it through this and know that this is happening for a reason. And so it's easy to look back and find that perspective. But in the. During the time, it's very difficult.
Cassie Kellner [00:54:16]:
Very.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:54:17]:
Yeah. And just try to enjoy as a wife, as a mom, you know, you have to. Something that I'm struggling with still is, you know, turning it off when I could work for hours and hours in front of my computer and telling myself that it's still going to be there.
Cassie Kellner [00:54:39]:
Yeah, Emily, you and me both. You know, I find myself, and then I'm like, what am I doing? What am I doing? This is going to be here on Monday morning when my children are on the bus and at school and, you know, like, what am I doing right now? You know, I. I think, you know, we have to check in with ourselves, too, and go. And. And, like, this whole word balance. I don't. I can't. I don't even. I. I don't think it's actually.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:55:12]:
I don't think balance truly exists. I really don't. It's just. I mean, there's just. There's just always going to be something to do. And I think a bigger word that is best for women and mothers is probably boundaries instead of. And, you know, setting up that boundary of when I know. I try to make it a point when I know that I'm going to be with my kids, you know, keep the phone on, do not disturb, don't look at it, be present and answer the questions that they have. Yeah. Have those boundaries of time where you have specific time. Only a lot. Something that I've been doing recently is if I have to get something done for work, I'll give myself 30 minutes and set 30 minutes and work on it. And then after 30 minutes, that's it. Put it away.
Cassie Kellner [00:56:19]:
Yeah, Yeah, I. I love. I. Oh, gosh, we could have a whole podcast about boundaries. But, yeah, setting boundaries. I also, you know, balance, it's almost like a trigger because I'm like, I'm not balancing very well, you know, But.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:56:35]:
I feel like that's perspective, too, because I look at. I look at balance, you know, again, back to my dad. Did my dad have any balance in his life working seven days a week? No. So I always say, you know, my. My dad missed out on so many things. You know, every volleyball game I ever played, my dad wasn't able to watch. And so when I think about balance and that type of balance, then you look at your life, and even though you feel like your life is Crazy. No, actually, I think I'm pretty balanced compared to.
Cassie Kellner [00:57:12]:
I know. Gosh, Emily, it's so true. You know, I also love the word. I've started using this. I probably stole it from someone off to Instagram because. Let's get real. But Harmony, I really. Somebody said this where, like, let's not think of this as balance, but more of, like, this work, life, family, harmony that you're trying to create in your life. And I was like, yes.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:57:38]:
Yeah.
Cassie Kellner [00:57:39]:
That I can get down with. Like, that. I'm like, okay. You know?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:57:45]:
Yeah. Our lives are much more harmonious than our parents, that's for sure.
Cassie Kellner [00:57:49]:
Oh, a hundred percent. Yes. Yes. Okay, let's play rapid fire, and we're gonna wrap this up. Are you ready?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:57:59]:
Okay.
Cassie Kellner [00:58:00]:
Okay, here we go. So I only have four little questions.
Dr. Emily Watson [00:58:05]:
Okay.
Cassie Kellner [00:58:06]:
What is one word now that you've asked your team to best describe your leadership style?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:58:15]:
I think looking back on everything that they said, I think it comes down to when I think about it, being appreciative. And every time, I just appreciate my team so much. And every time that I leave a chair, you know, I try to say thank you both to the parent or patient that's sitting there and to my team member. So I always try to. I think my team will agree to, you know, think of ways that I can show that I appreciate them because I couldn't do what I do without them. And they are the ones that make my day go smoother, and they're the ones that help me, you know, do this whole operation. So, yeah, I love it.
Cassie Kellner [00:59:07]:
I love it. What is the most underrated lesson from your parents journey?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:59:13]:
The most underrated lesson. I'm gonna glance down. You can edit this part. Oh, yes. Okay. This is a good one. I think the. Ask me that again, Cassie.
Cassie Kellner [00:59:31]:
Okay. Ready?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:59:32]:
Yeah.
Cassie Kellner [00:59:34]:
What's the most underrated lesson from your parents journey?
Dr. Emily Watson [00:59:37]:
Okay. The most underrated lesson has to do with what I would call the ripple effect and how there's this quote that I've said, you know, never underestimate the difference. If you ever underestimate the difference that you can make, you've never spent the night with a mosquito or something like that. Oh, yeah. If something along those lines, like, you know, a mosquito is pretty tiny, but boy, it make have a large effect. And that has to do with these two ladies. Okay. They're the reason that I'm even sitting here in front of you today. Two ladies from a the First Mennonite Church in Berne. And their names were. Are Mar Traw Beggar. And oh, Maggie Lichty went to their pastor and saw these stories on the news and said, you know, we would like to make a difference. We want to help. And the pastor at the church said, okay, let's see what we can do. And it was through that that my parents were able to come to the United States, which is just mind boggling to me. And through that, that, you know, they formed different committees when my parents arrived to provide food and shelter and doctor's appointments and driving them to learn English and all of these little things. It is, it. It blows my mind when I think about the fact that two people had a thought to want to help someone and what. How that can literally change the trajectory of someone's life and multiple people's lives after that. Just from one decision to help. That is, I just like, that is so huge in my life now when I think about, you know, things that I do or can do to help others, like, that is a huge part of it because there were so many people that helped my parents when they came here and just that little, you know, two people saying we wanted to.
Cassie Kellner [01:02:11]:
Powerful. It's so powerful.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:02:17]:
Yeah, it, it's. It is just so wild. It really is.
Cassie Kellner [01:02:24]:
Okay. Something you're grateful for today.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:02:29]:
Oh boy. I'm. Yeah. I mean my parents, my family, my team, this life that I get to have, it's all, it's. It's overwhelmingly. I just feel so blessed.
Cassie Kellner [01:02:47]:
When you have moments with your family, do you reflect in those sometimes maybe at the end or later or alone in your car listening to some crazy sad song or happy song or, you know, something that takes you back. Do you have reflection where you go, whoa.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:03:08]:
I. Yeah, I mean, I feel like I. Especially through writing the book and reflecting on my parents entire journey and all of the little things that, you know, we didn't even get a touch on the things that happened to them.
Cassie Kellner [01:03:26]:
Yes.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:03:27]:
I, Yeah, I mean every, like I said, every day just think about my dad's statement that it's a miracle that we're here that I'm here. And. Yeah, it's. It really makes, it just makes you so appreciative the whole day.
Cassie Kellner [01:03:45]:
Yeah. Gosh. Okay, last one. A habit or a mindset that helps you start the day strong.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:03:54]:
I. These are non negotiables. Okay.
Cassie Kellner [01:04:00]:
Love it.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:04:00]:
So it doesn't matter if. I mean, we were. My husband and I were just on our anniversary trip and no matter where I am in the world, I still wake up at 4:30am you do? I. I can't the thing is, is the part that people don't see as a business owner.
Cassie Kellner [01:04:25]:
Oh, yes.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:04:25]:
You know, and I think about some. You know, maybe you can edit this out, Cassie. But when we talk about, like, guys.
Cassie Kellner [01:04:36]:
Yeah.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:04:37]:
You know, I feel like some guys are like, oh, it's so easy. Like, I'm just gonna shut this off, and I'm just not gonna do this. You know, it's easier, I feel like, for guys to do that because as women, we are. We're in charge of the schedule. We're in charge of all the paperwork that comes home from school. We're in charge of signing the kids up for this and signing them up for that and making sure that they get here and making sure they get there. And then on top of that, all of the work that you have for cases that you have to do for your patients. And so my little thing is, no matter where I am, I have to have that time in the morning to know that there's something that I can get done and go, okay, I did something for the day, and now I can go enjoy the rest of my day. So every morning I start 4:30. I get. You know, if I'm on vacation, I might. Now I still try to get a couple of hours, and then. And then I work out, and then I'm ready for my day. It's. I tried to. Not, like, I'll try, but as women, the thing is, is that you can't turn off your brain.
Cassie Kellner [01:05:52]:
No.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:05:53]:
And so it's like, well, I can either try to sleep in and then wake up and feel like I didn't get anything done and then feel like I can't enjoy myself, or I can just get up, get it done, and then, okay, let's enjoy our day.
Cassie Kellner [01:06:09]:
I love this. We're not cutting it because so many people can relate to this on so many different levels. As a woman, as a woman who is managing all the things. You know, I talk about this with Dr. Maggie Law in one of my very first episodes. Being a mother and. And being a business owner and. And having a family. And by the way, I want to make this very clear to my own husband. I have to have control over some of these things. Like, you know, it's my own fault. You know, I. I make the appointments and I do the things, and I'm filling out. My husband filled out I.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:06:54]:
A.
Cassie Kellner [01:06:54]:
A permission slip for a field trip the other day. My mouth dropped. He's standing next to me and go, oh, you filled it out. I had, like, this judgy Tone. I was like, oh, you filled it out. And he's like, yeah. And I was like, oh. And in my mind, this is in my crazy brain. I thought, well, is he gonna put it in the calendar? Because how am I going to remember if there's a field trip? I was like, okay. And I didn't want to do that because I didn't want to be like, I could have filled that out. Even though I'm like, I need. You know, it's all the things. It's a double edged sword. And I was like, okay, here. I was like, oh, okay, well, will you put it in the calendar? He's like, yeah. And I'm like, actually, I don't have any meetings that day. Maybe I'll do. Maybe I'll volunteer, you know? But all these things in a matter of 0.2 seconds went through my head because he filled out the field trip permission slip.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:07:52]:
I feel that so much. Did you get the skylight calendar, by the way?
Cassie Kellner [01:07:57]:
Okay, we need to talk about this, by the way. I wish this were like an ad for skylight, but no, my neighbor just got the skylight and we were at book club, okay. And I was like, I walked by, I go, you got a skylight? She goes, I did. And I was like, so then I got to play with it. And I'm like, I'm getting it. It's actually been in my car. Have not done it. And I don't know why. Did you get it?
Dr. Emily Watson [01:08:23]:
Oh, I've had. So I had this last winter. My. I messaged my best friends because I had taken my daughter, okay?
Cassie Kellner [01:08:34]:
She.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:08:35]:
She was on a travel volleyball team, okay. And I had the address in my phone. And, you know, the coach had sent a message that actually the location had changed, and I apparently didn't change it in my phone. So I took my family to the wrong place and there's no one there when we arrive. And I messaged my friends and I'm just like, you guys, I cannot do this. Like, I can't. I can't keep track of the school calendar and then the sports calendars and then my calendar. I mean, it's just. It's so much like, I can't do this. And they both re. They all replied like, do you have a skylight calendar? You need to get a skylight calendar. And so I ordered one that day. And we all joke because my husband, God love him, and he is my husband, he cooks for us and he does all the. All the maintenance things and he takes wonderful care of us. But that dang calendar. It just gets them. It really does. And all my friends that I talked to about it, same thing, like, we die on this calendar. And my best friend said to me, if it's not in the calendar, it doesn't exist. Yes, it doesn't exist.
Cassie Kellner [01:09:54]:
And so it's not real.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:09:56]:
So I. I cannot tell you the number of times that I have. And I think my husband actually gets it now because recently we had to go through this thing, and it was like, you know, we had a miscommunication about whatever was going on. And my question was, did you look at the calendar? My husband's like, no, I didn't look at the calendar. And you're like, okay, I'm gonna try and stay calm.
Cassie Kellner [01:10:20]:
Right?
Dr. Emily Watson [01:10:21]:
And then a couple days pass, and then you have this kind of a different conversation. But then your question is, did you look at the calendar? And then it's like, no, I didn't look at the calendar. And then I. I said, finally, I said, I'm. I'm gonna try and say this. I am not meaning to sound crappy. I just need you to look at the calendar every day or when. If you want to do something, it needs to go on the calendar. So I know. Otherwise, like my friend says, it doesn't exist.
Cassie Kellner [01:10:52]:
It doesn't exist. It doesn't exist. If my husband would have filled out that permission slip and I didn't see it, I would have had no idea to dress my son in his first grade T shirt to go.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:11:07]:
That's why you need the skylight calendar, because you're getting it picture of it. Because then you have to give your husband two steps. It's first, you feel great. Thank you so much for filling out the permission slip. So appreciate that. And then step two is you have to take a picture of the permission slip and send it to the skylight calendar.
Cassie Kellner [01:11:26]:
Done.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:11:26]:
If you want to add a step three, it's edit the notes so that you have those little things like this.
Cassie Kellner [01:11:31]:
We'll be doing step three. Don't worry. Come on. I live in a sauna. You think I tried to set up a sauna for my husband? He's like, you've gone too far.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:11:40]:
I made. I make my husband asanas. I do. Yes. And also in the skylight.
Cassie Kellner [01:11:47]:
I love you.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:11:48]:
There's a to do list. You can also have a to do list assigned to a specific person. So love it now. He did. He tells me, I haven't looked at asana in a while. So that's why if there's Something in there. I tell him, please look at Asana.
Cassie Kellner [01:12:01]:
Yeah, I love it. I love this so much. Oh, gosh. I can relate on so many, so many different levels. Emily, you know, everyone, everyone, this book comes out today. Roots of Resilience. Lessons in Courage, Family, and the Power of Showing Up Every Day. Dr. Emily Taing Watson, you are simply the best. And I can't thank you enough for sharing this story, for allowing me to read this, for doing this podcast with me. Everyone can find this on Amazon and I, I will be sure to add all kinds of links to this podcast. It is such a powerful story. We didn't even get into, which I'm really glad, actually. I want people to read it, but your parents journey on how they got here, the jungle, the darkness, your trip back to Cambodia. I mean, it's so powerful. Emily, truly, thank you so much for spending the time with me and sharing the story.
Dr. Emily Watson [01:13:13]:
No, thank you, Cassie, for everything that you've done to help us with Asana, for letting me share this story. And you have been wonderful. So thank you. I appreciate you.
Cassie Kellner [01:13:26]:
Thank you. Thank you so much. I will add live links so those of you listening to this, click on it, order this book. It's a beautiful, beautiful story, and especially if you're in orthodontics, you can relate so much. Emily, thank you so much for joining me. Thank you for joining me on the Bloom Effect, where we keep it real, keep it growing, and always keep it team. TABLE first, if today's episode sparked something for you, an idea, a shift, or just a reminder that you're not alone, take a second and share it with your team or a fellow ortho leader. Be sure to subscribe so you never miss a convo. And if you're loving the show, leave a review. It helps more practices find us and join the movement. And if you're ready to bring this kind of energy into your practice, visit discover everbloom.com to learn more about working together. Until next time, keep leading with heart, keep building with intention, and keep blooming right where you're planted.
